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Friday, September 07, 2007

Shoot 'Em Up 

When Shoot ‘Em Up begins, we’re confronted with the face of Smith (Clive Owen). We take in his intense, maybe even lunatic eyes. The five o’clock shadow. The wild hair. And just as we begin to appreciate the finer details of this dangerous man gone to seed, he lifts a big carrot up and takes a bite off the tip. By the time the end credits roll, at least four people will die with the assistance of carrots; this is three more carrot-related fatalities than I have seen in the past ten years of movies combined. The first was in Jack Frost, a movie about a serial killer who comes back to life as a snowman. Just let that soak in for a while: In the Venn diagram of film history, Shoot ‘Em Up overlaps with Jack Frost.

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