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Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Adventures in Quote Whore Hyperbole, Part 1 

Wherein we find that, according to Maxim's Pete Hammond, almost every major comedy release this year is the best comedy of the year.. or even, perhaps, the decade.

Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny: "The Pick of Destiny may be the year's greatest guilty pleasure."

There's also the silly quote from the TV ad -- conspicuously missing from the online review -- that declares Pick of Destiny the "greatest rock comedy ever," or somesuch nonsense. Without having actually seen it, I'm gonna go ahead and say that's bullshit.

Borat: "Its [sic] not just the funniest movie of the year, it's the funniest movie in many years."

Yes, Borat is very funny. It may be the funniest movie of the year -- though I'm not sure. But the funniest movie in many years? No, not a chance.

School for Scoundrels: "Consistently and uncontrollably hilarious — at least some of the time" (Wait, what? Doesn't that seem like a direct contradiction?) [...] "It's surprisingly clever and refreshing entertainment that deserves a place at the head of the comedy class."

Accepted: "Accepted makes the comedy honor roll for being inventive and riotously funny. It's Animal House meets Ferris Bueller for a new generation — but so much more."

Uh.

Snakes on a Plane: "SOAP may be saddled with ludicrous dialogue but it's got more action-packed fun than just about any other movie seen this summer. This sucker really works! In other words, welcome to the season's number one guilty pleasure."

Talladega Nights: "Talladega Nights is the summer comedy winner that clocks more laughs per minute than any other."

Yeah, no.

The Break-Up: "In fact, The Break-Up should be required viewing for anyone who is, has ever been, or thinks they will be in a relationship. The Break-Up is a hilarious, honest, edgy, and painfully funny movie that truly proves men and women really are from different planets. [...] This ranks as one of the best American comedies in years."

I'm pretty sure The Break-Up wasn't even the best American comedy that weekend.

Over the Hedge: "Over the Hedge jumps waaay over the top on the laugh meter. [...] Trust us — this movie should be in the Funny Hall of Fame."

Funny Hall of Fame, you say... tell me, do you, the reader, know anyone who actually saw this?

American Dreamz: "This is just part of the off-the-wall premise of an outrageously funny film that goes for big laughs and nails them every time. American Dreamz is the kind of dead-on, politically incorrect satire Hollywood movies rarely attempt anymore."

That's funny. When I walked out of American Dreamz, I was trying to imagine a satire even safer and more spineless than the one I'd just seen. I couldn't.

I know, I know. This is Pete Hammond of Maxim we're talking about here. He's not exactly Manohla Dargis and Maxim ain't no New York Times. But hey: nobler critics than myself have taken time out of their schedule to snipe the people who make their profession look like shit. I can only do the same.

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