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Monday, March 08, 2004

Is it just me... 

Okay, am I the only person in the world who thinks Jeph Loeb is a goddamn hack? A consistent hack, maybe, but the only reason I'm still buying Superman/Batman is out of a sense of loyalty, not out of a joy for the series.

Here's a clue, people: His 'mysteries,' especially The Long Halloween and Hush, are no more geniune mysteries than I am a goddamned pedophile (I'm not).

Here's how a Jeph Loeb "mystery" works. People start dying or something. Every issue some new person is presented as the possible suspect, and possibly some new, obtuse clue is shown. The character (and the audience) are then jerked around for issue after issue, in a fashion more representing a travelogue than a natural chain of cause and effect, until an unsatisfactory "conclusion" that's supposed to be a "twist" is thrust upon us at the end.

I put "twist" in quotation marks because these twists are always lame. After we're given one red herring after another, the real villain behind the nefarious plot is revealed, and turns out to be... someone we never could have guessed, because we were never given any hints, any setup, anything resembling the growing sense of suspicion that accompanies an actual mystery. It's just someone you didn't expect and could have guessed only by throwing a dart at a list of names.

In fact, I'm pretty sure that's how they chose the Riddler as the "mastermind" behind Hush.

The resolution to his damn mysteries are always arbitrary and unsatisfying. The audience has no fair chance of guessing who the murderer (or whatever) is from the clues given, so what's the point in following along with the story? Just pick up the last issue and you're set.

Whew. Had to get that off my chest.

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